Back then the idea of a child free wedding was not something you heard too often. But with weddings getting more expensive and couple looking to cut down the costs, child free weddings are almost becoming the norm. Obviously not all child free weddings are so due to budget, some opt for child free weddings because the idea of a reception running late with kids around is not something many mothers would agree to.
With the various reasons people opt for child-free weddings, there is one common concern about it; “How do I communicate this to my Guests without upsetting anyone?”
Before I answer the question above I’d like to state that it is almost impossible to please everyone. People are different and so are their requests, do what you can to please as most people as you can but never do that by displeasing yourself.
Now that we have that clear, let’s get to the real point of this post; 4 Things to Remember when Asking for a Child free Wedding.
1. Make It Plain – Invitation and Website: Once that decision to have a child free wedding has been made, the couple should decide how they would like this information communicated to their guests. One of the most direct ways (a way I’d advise even though some may not agree), is making it plain by writing it on your invitation and/or wedding website. These are the 2 major locations guests would refer to in the days leading up to the wedding. If you are not certain that word of mouth would do the job efficiently, this more direct approach is sure to do it.
On the invitation, you may also want to specify how many seats you are reserving for the family or who in the family you are specifically inviting. Also, if you have just a few parent friends that are somewhat tech savvy (savvy enough to check emails), sending an email – or making a call – might also be a good idea after they have received the invitation.
2. Wording: Once you have chosen to make it plain for your guests to know about your child free wedding, next thing is to use proper wording. I bet you have heard the saying that “it is not what you say but how you say it”; that’s like communication 101 and should be adhered to even when planning a wedding. When organizing a child free wedding, one should be careful to use the right words as not to come off the wrong way. Negated words (words with no/not), have a way of rubbing people the wrong way, and should be avoided as much as possible.
In this context, it is advised that phrases such as “Adult event only” be used as compared to “No children allowed”.
3. Word Of Mouth: If writing about your child free wedding on your website or invitation is not your style, another solution is by word of mouth. Implore your family, close friends and wedding party to spread the word of your child free wedding before and after the invitation has been sent. This is an effective method if you are 100% sure that your family, friends and wedding party all know your invited guests; you don’t want a guest showing up with her kids under the “I did not get the memo” excuse.
4. Picking a Rule and Sticking to it: In the case where a couple is considering inviting some children and not others, because opinions may vary, this could look bad to your guests. While family children may get a pass – eg, children in the wedding party, it is generally advised to pick a “rule” and stick to it.
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Photo Credits: Kids Photo from Yellow Panama Destination Wedding by Chloe Moore Photography.
Question of the Day: Are you having (or did you have) a child free wedding? What challenges did you face and how did you handle them?