We’d be continuing with our post on what I believe is the major source/cause of the dreaded wedding planning stress most couples talk about. It’s all about people management! I strongly believe once you understand the relationships/interactions involved and handle them appropriately, the journey would be a lot smoother.
In Part 1 of this post, we covered the relationships with Direct Family, In-Laws, the “Never Heard of” Family members and the Wedding Party. Here are the last 4 relationships to keep in mind and figure out how to handle;
Key People and Relationships you’d have to know how handle to avoid Wedding Planning Stress
5. Vendors: It’s only a short while after you first get engaged before you start thinking of the actual wedding planning which would highly involve vendors. No matter how much of a DIY wedding you are having, to some extent you would have hired hands working for your wedding and so you have to be mindful of how you treat them in order to maintain a great working relationship with them.
See our post on 4 ways to be the best client ever and try your best to implement these. Prior to the wedding and even on the wedding day, the degree of personal contact you may have with your vendors would differ (especially if you have a wedding planner) but one thing should remain constant for all cases – RESPECT!
6. Guests: A lot of times we read on how wedding guests can be the perfect guests. The list is unending with things like RSVP-ing on time, dressing appropriately, bringing a gift, etc. But only a few times do we read posts on how a couple can be great hosts to their guests.
As with every relationship, respect is needed for it to succeed. Think of how you’d like to feel and be treated as a wedding guest, then use that feeling to plan for your own wedding guests.
You’d want to send them invitations early enough so they can plan properly for the event, communicating to them how much you value and respect their time and presence. You’d want to feed them, appreciate them and ensure they have a good time with you as a host.
Is your wedding time set for the summer when it’s scorching hot? think of cool drinks to keep them hydrated. Is your reception very late in the evening? Perhaps you’d need more appetizers to keep them from starving. All these details would communicate to your guests your thoughtfulness/respect for their presence at your wedding.
7. Uninvited Well-Wishers: Now dealing with these people can be a little bit awkward because they are the sweetest and most-eager- to-help set of people but for whatever reason (see post here on the many reasons) they did not make your guest list.
They are those who were very quick to send you “congratulations”, re-posting your amazing #SheSaidYes photo on their social media with warmly felt captions, recommend amazing vendors, they might have even reached out letting you know they are happy to help you with whatever you need. But still, they won’t be getting an invite.
Remember, some of these people might be doing this truly out of the goodness of their hearts and not just because they are hoping to be invited. Treat these people with respect, say thank you but avoid taking them on their offer to assist you in wedding planning if you are still sure they won’t be invited. If you really need that extra help get a hired help or make use of your willing family, closer friends or bridesmaids. Let’s be honest, it could a be a bit insensitive to use their help and not invite them to the event.
8. Spouse-to-be: Though we’ve placed this at the bottom, do not be mistaken – this is the most important relationship of them all. Not only just for the wedding planning but really for the life ahead. While for most couples, wedding planning may not be the first “project” ever worked on together, it is most likely the most tasking because of the degree of finances, people and time management involved.
A couple should be mindful of each other when it comes to how wedding planning decisions are made. Upon plunging into full wedding planning mode, the delegation of tasks is highly required so at no point does one party feels overwhelmed with the all the work or the other feels like his/her opinions are not being considered at all.
Lastly with the pressures of wedding planning, once in a while, a couple should take breaks and focus on themselves. Go on a date, hang out with friends, indulge in the things you both enjoy to keep your relationship fresh. Weddings (with all that planning) is only one day, once it’s done the real deal (Marriage) begins and you have to be equipped to last! So never put the wedding planning above the marriage planning.